Chinks in the armor

I never thought that learning to love myself would be the hardest thing I would ever try to accomplish in my life. It seems at times that I run five steps forward and get knocked back two, but I am still moving ahead. I am still working toward my goal of being completely in love with me. This journey started with me looking for someone to share my life with. I dated and dated and looked for "the one" only to find myself sabotaging any real chance I had for finding him. This realization lead my to look inward for the problem and I could see clearly that I was looking for someone to love me so I didn't have to. That was a kick in the head. How could I expect someone to love me for both of us, that was a lot of pressure to place on one person. So, my journey begins. I hope that by creating this blog it will push my progress further towards healing. Today I have to forgive myself for the unnecessary challenges that I have put upon myself. I forgive myself for the self limiting behaviors of my past, the hatred, the punishments. I let that all go and start anew. True love and happiness are my goals and blessing others with hope is my mission.